Unlock Inner Peace: 10 Easy Self-Care Strategies Every Modern Woman Needs
How to navigate the world, as a midlife woman, from a place of self-care and calmness.
Why Do Women Need Self-Care?
In the modern world, we never seem to stop doing things. The world is constantly busy, whether it is doing stuff for leisure, for work, for the home, or for/with our partners and family.
When I was a child, the shops closed on Sundays and half days on Wednesdays. There were no 24-hour deliveries, no internet (gasp!!) and only four channels on TV, which went off at night.
Mums generally stayed home and did the housework, sometimes with a part-time job, perhaps when the kids were older. Dads were usually the breadwinners. That's not to say those were the “good old days,” as this caused a lot of issues, especially for women who wanted more choices than to be housewives (and rightly so), but it meant we all had to slow down at least when the shops and workplaces were shut.
Life was harder quite often, but it was also more naturally mindful.
We had to wait for things and do things away from screens. We got fresh air, read books and real newspapers, yarn crafts and embroidery, and did things in the garden or allotment. Self-care was not so much of a conscious decision as we often did beneficial things anyway!
In the modern world, we need to be strategic with self-care and make a point of implementing it, which many of us find hard to do as we are of the between generation, where we embraced the new 24/7 digital world in its infancy, while still having a foot in the old world which had began to feel a bit slow and inconvenient in comparison. We grew up feeling we needed to do more, be more, work harder and achieve constantly, and what’s more, we had to do it all right now.
And now we often feel burnt out and exhausted. Coupled with the Peri/menopause and other middle-aged delights, we must take care of ourselves. Self-care is not just a buzzword anymore but a necessity.
So, how can we go about it?
Actually, it’s easier than you think.
10 Self-Care Strategies For Modern Women:
Stay Hydrated
Dehydration can cause all kinds of symptoms, including:
- Feeling really parched and thirsty
- Dark yellow wee that smells stronger than usual
- Weeing less often and getting constipated too
- Getting dizzy or feeling a bit lightheaded
- Feeling absolutely knackered- Mouth, lips, and tongue feeling dried out, sore and cracking
Generally, it is recommended by the NHS to aim for 6-8 glasses or cups of water a day, including a small amount of fruit juice or tea and coffee. For a more precise amount of fluid to aim for, this calculator is quite handy.
If you are dehydrated quite often and drinking the right amount of fluid, see a Doctor, as this can indicate more serious health implications.Eat Well
The Eatwell Guide to a healthy diet.
You are what you eat, especially if you are a vegan like me. What goes into your body is the building blocks of everything your body becomes. So, while having a little of what you fancy is good for the soul, feeding your body a healthy and nutritious diet is vital.
According to the NHS Eatwell Guide, aim for:
- At least five fist-sized portions of fruit or veg a day.
- Include higher fibre starches such as potatoes, wholemeal bread, rice or pasta
- Some dairy or dairy alternatives (preferably fortified with calcium and vitamin D)
- Proteins such as legumes, beans, fish or meat
- Small amounts of unsaturated fats and sugars.Sleep Well
Easier said than done at times! But the guidelines tell us we should try for a good 7 hours at night.
If you struggle with sleep, here are some excellent tips from The Sleep Foundation to help you to the land of nod.
If sleeping is an issue, (and for many of us it is,) you do not have to simply put up with it. Do take it up with your GP as they might be able to help you.
I struggle with sleep as I have restless leg syndrome, which is caused by my adenomyosis, which I only recently found out about. So I am getting that fixed and looking forward to a good nights rest at the end of it, after YEARS of struggling. I can’t wait!
You can’t practise self-care if you are so very tired that you have no energy to take care of yourself!Exercise
We don’t always feel like it, but keeping our bodies moving is good for so many things. From helping to manage depression to losing weight and avoiding heart problems, exercise is your friend.
Some of us like to really go for it and take up jogging, and going to the gym and doing all the things, but in all honesty, for me that is just too hard and I can never keep it up. It is better to create an exercise routine that you can stick to long term.
For me, that’s walking the dog. I’m told that 150 minutes of weekly exercise is a good amount to aim for, including 10 minutes of brisk walking daily to raise your heartbeat a bit.
If you are not able to walk, then here is a good guide on some alternative exercises you could do from a chair or wheelchair.
I also think exercise should be fun. Just before Christmas, when I had this mad idea that I could do 75 Hard (spoiler - I couldn’t, my Dad passed away and all thoughts of twice daily exercise went out of the window) but I found myself playing “Just Dance” with the family and we all had a brilliant laugh. None of us are great dancers except my daughter but we all got out of breath and enjoyed doing so, meaning we are more likely to repeat the experience.See your friends and family
If you are lucky enough to have friends and family around you, a good self care strategy for the modern woman is to make a point of seeing them, if they make you happy. (Not all friends or family are good for us, so I’ll let you make your own judgement on that.)
Being lonely never helps anyone, especially when we have so many stresses and strains on us both physically and mentally. Even a coffee with a person who lifts you, and lets you vent, or you help them in some way, will bring some light into your world.
If you have nobody to talk to or spend time with, consider asking your GP or Council about local groups and amenities where you could find others in a similar situation.
If you feel really alone and need somebody to talk to, the Samaritans are a very kind, and caring bunch who will listen to your woes. Sadly they can’t always answer every call, which is why Twyla found herself fundraising for them last November.Journal daily
Those of us who write know how therapeutic writing can be. You do not have to be a great writer, you have to put pen to paper, (or finger to keyboard) and see what flows out.
You can write a single sentence or full pages, and about anything you like. You can write poetry or a diary or any other forms that the words come out. You can doodle too. You can use a pen and paper, or a digital journal (I use Diarium.) There is no right or wrong.
Daily journalling helps us to get our thoughts and feelings out into the world instead of bottling them up. It also gives a chance for a daily gratitude, and to chart our progress in all kinds of ways over a long period of time.
It gives us ways to access our memories long past, and to revisit experiences from a future standpoint to re-examine our thought processes.
As writers, journalling gives us a source of inspiration to write about. After all, what is more compelling a story than real-life?Have regular check-ups
It is better to think in terms of “prevention is better than cure” especially when it comes to our health.
While a regular check-up will not prevent illness from occurring, it can mean that certain things are caught sooner and become easier to treat.
With the NHS providing free three-yearly cervical smears for women aged 25-64; free mammograms for 50-70 year olds every three years; Menopause support; Sexual Health screening and more in the local well woman clinic, it has never been easier for women to keep their health monitored.
You owe it to yourself and to anyone who is relying on you to be well, to take advantage of women’s healthcare services. After all, without you, who will make sure your family doesn’t burn the house down?Have a clean home
Yeah, yeah, I know. NOBODY who is normal enjoys housework. Neither should it be the domain of the woman of the house to take care of it. But whether you do it, or someone else does, doesn’t really matter so much as the benefits of living in a clean environment.
Not only is it better for your physical health not to live in a germy shit-pit, it is better for your nostrils (as muck stinks) and also for your mental health too.
They say a cluttered home is a cluttered mind, and it is true. How much better do you feel after a spring clean, and a good throwing-crap-out session?
I really love Purdy & Figg cleaning products, especially the multisurface cleaner which has all sorts of fancy scents, and you can get £10 off your first order with them if you use my affiliate link here.
Purdy and Figg goodies - from their website At-home spa days
Spa breaks cost a fortune. But a spa day doesn’t have to. After all, is that not why Superdrug was invented? Why not get the girls round and spend the day having an at-home spa day? Apply eye masks, do your nails, use those foot bath things, and chat about all the latest gossip at the same time.
If one of your buddies happens to be a hairdresser or a beautician, better still! They can earn while you sit back and relax with your girls.
Have wine if you drink wine - if you fancy an alcohol free tipple (like me - 14 years sober) I highly recommend Kylie Minogue Alcohol Free Rose or Captain Morgan Spiced Gold 0% Rum from Tesco. My partner and I have been supping it all Christmas and several times we had to check we were not drinking the alcohol versions as they tasted so naughty.
If alcohol-free soft drinks are not your thing, you can also have Appletiser or Shloer, which are equally delicious.Unplug from Social Media
Social media is perhaps one of the most antisocial things to have happened since the internet was invented.
From scrolling through people’s fake perfect lives on Instagram, where even the garden fence is subjected to a filter, to people being outright horrible to each other on Twitter/X, the constant assault on our mental health is overwhelming.
Even if you only add real life friends and family, you still end up having to look through all their drama, their drunken posts, their better-than-yours- lives that rub salt in the wounds.
Here on Substack, we have “Notes” which is tame in comparison to some of the awfulness of social media, and we have the ability to create a nice little bubble for ourselves free from sponsored far right posts and videos of animals suffering, but as with all good things, I worry humans will ruin it.
So having a digital detox for a few days every so often is AMAZING for forcing you to think outside of your screen and see the world as it really is.
While it is great at this time of year to set goals and to have resolutions, the most impactful changes will be the ones we can stick to easily.
What from the above list do you already do?
What do you plan to implement?
Do you have any other tips on self-care?
Drop MMC a comment below!
Warm ‘n’ Fuzzies,
Freya xx
Today’s Sub Stats
I promised to share my stats each week so that normal writers like me can see what those who are not Substack Superstars are likely to achieve. (Handily this ties in with tip 10, “Unplug from Social Media” as I want you to experience life (and Substack) as it truly is, rather than a fake ass filtered version of it!)
30 day views are down, but as I didn’t write over Christmas, that is to be expected.
